We’re all assholes in our own way…
So don’t be so hard on yourself.
Enjoy your weekend.
I don't know about you, but I won't be drinking any green beer today. I might, however, sit down to watch The Boondock Saints instead. I suppose we all choose to celebrate our holidays differently.
While we're on the subject of celebrating in a unique manner, how about I share with you the St. Paddy's Day Edition, GIF of the day:
How does this qualify as a St. Paddy's Day edition if Michael Fassbender was born in Germany? Well, his mother is from Larne, County Antrim, in Northern Ireland.
You ever start your day with a song stuck in your head? I did, yesterday.
In the mornings I don’t jump out of bed like some folks, I like to take my time with it and ease myself into the waking world. Yesterday morning I woke up fairly early, stretched my legs out under the covers and then started looking around the room. As my eyes began to focus, I heard something in the distance. I zeroed in on that sound and soon realized I was hearing the beginning notes of a song. I instantly thought to myself, “how funny, I wonder how that got stuck there. I literally just woke up.” Amused and still slightly disoriented, I hung out in bed for a moment stretching and thinking about work and what I needed to get done. I then thought about my looming deadline and decided that I should probably get started with my day. I got up and out of bed, shook off the last of the sleep and headed to the bathroom. On my way there, that song that I woke to, popped back into my head, those same beginning notes over and over again; “I’m fucked,” I thought. That song was going to be stuck there, all day long—I just knew it.
Unfortunately, there was nothing that could be done so I just continued with my morning routine. I began straightening up the house, putting things away, dishes in the sink, jackets in the closets and dog toys in dog toy basket. After that, I got to settling in on the couch to do some serious work. I’m weird in that I can’t think when the house is messy so I go around putting things away in the mornings, after I get up and before I make my coffee.
Welcome to my world, it’s a creeper place, I know.
While I was cleaning up, the first minute or so of that song seeped back into my conscious thought and subsequently, I decided to embrace it and make it my Theme Song of the Day. At one point during my breakfast coffee ritual, I zoned out of reality and slipped back into the part of my brain that was looping said Theme Song. This was also the first time I actually paid close attention to the noise inside my skull and bothered to listen to the lyrics. It was at this point that I decided this had actually been a terrible choice for Theme Song of the Day because the lyrics did not reflect my current mood, even if the music did. While waiting for my coffee to brew and while staring down the Keurig machine, I decided I needed to get the stuck song, unstuck and replaced with something more reflective of my actual mood. I needed funny and random; I needed something that would induce a satisfying belly laugh or two.
As I always do when I’m in search of random, I turned to the internet, Google to be exact. I needed something funny, fast and sticky enough to adhere to the afore mentioned special part of the brain that loops crap in your mind. I figured a gif search was in order. Gifs are short and to the point. They usually involve humor and besides, the good thing about a gif search is that there’s plenty of opportunity to get things stuck in that special place that loops things. What I came up with in my search was pure gold because now, I’m obsessed with exiting rooms like this, any chance I get.
And so it was that the Theme Song of The Day was swiftly replaced with the looping image of greatness below. If I could exit the room like this right now, I would—I so would.
(Image courtesy of my husband's cell phone.)
I was sitting in my living room just now, T.V. on in the background, cat all stretched out on the ottoman, bulldog laying on the rug and chihuahua snuggling on the couch. As I surveyed my furry family, it occurred to me that it’s almost been a year that I packed these three goobers up into my Prius and hauled their asses along with my husband’s across an entire nation, a large one at that. Three thousand miles with one husband, two dogs and a cat in my car, it was intense.
Several days into our cross-country journey, our nerves were on edge and we were ready to crash somewhere for a good and long night’s sleep. We decided we’d stop in South Dakota, Mount Rushmore to be exact. We were determined to build some fun into our trip; we didn’t want the whole thing to consist of tedious driving. My husband and I are nerds so we were totally psyched to see Mt. Rushmore, but we didn’t know if we’d make it with all three pets in tact.
By the time we rolled into the hotel entrance, everyone was on everyone else’s last nerve. We all just wanted to rest in a space that would allow for some walking. Sitting in a car for hours on end will make you crazy, I don’t care who you are. There is no audio book in this world good enough to take the edge off a cross-country drive with Animal Farm in your back seat.
I dedicate today’s Gif of the Day to our cat. She went completely apeshit, but she made it to the Mount Rushmore parking lot and ultimately the promise land, California. You’re one of the good ones, Cat.
Cheers to you.
I have a friend who hates cats. Because of this, I find great pleasure in posting cat pictures to her social media pages, sending pictures to her via email and sometimes even through text. Despite my best efforts she insists on hating our animal friends. "Evil," she shouts as she shakes her head, disgusted with the very existence of this particular mixture of whiskers and fur. "They're just waiting for the right moment to attack, " she informs me. "They just want love," I respond.
Seeing as there's a thick shroud of feline hate that hangs over my existence, I deem it fair to make today's Gif of the Day, cat related. I dedicate this to my friends who hate cats; you know who you are, enjoy.